I get these pains in my hands and my stomach sweats when I think about you and how you have this control over me and my perception of everyone around me. No one compares to you. Every single person is a temporary time filler until the next time filler and the next one. I see no end to this cycle any time soon, and for the fucking life of me still believe the words you said to me instead of the truth that you told me. I felt it in the way you touched me, the way you kissed me and more than anything, in the way you look at me. I’ll never understand why I was casted off, why you do so many amazing things every day and yet can’t be honest with yourself about your happiness. Fuck you for not choosing me. You’ve ruined me by being that ever glowing trophy of a human no meager asshole could even dream of comparing to. I will waste so much of my time breaking hearts, just passing time.